Compartment to Single

So, I quickly realized that while living in a box is fine for me; living in a box surrounded  by other girls in boxes is not okay.

 

My director told me (again, I know) that she wants me to work full-time to the end of June. At first, I was against it. I had already made a plan to do other things in my free time. However, I have decided to take her up on it since I don't feel comfortable staying in this space with crazy/bored women and not even being able to properly lock up my things.

So, I have told my director that I will stay full-time. Also, a private room opened up upstairs in the same share house. While I don't want to keep living with the crazies, I don't want to pay the extra $200 or so dollars to change to another house/company. So I will be moving upstairs, to a single, at the first of May; which is right before I head off on my next vacation to Izu~

In the meantime, the cherry blossoms are blooming and everything is pink~ haha
I'm not the biggest fan of flowers, but I do enjoy watching the petals floating down like rain and sprinkling the walking paths. It is rather majestic looking.

It is now the peak time for flower viewing in Tokyo, but that also means it is the worst time for hay fever... but you have to take the good with the bad, I guess. My eyes are burning, but I can take in some nice sites, so I think I will be out and about this weekend seeing what beauty I can find.

It also creates for some nice scenery on my commute to work. Enjoy! ;)

Japanese women = 12 year old girls

So, as proof that this was a terrible mistake and that I need to find another place ASAP..... unmarried, middle-aged, Japanese women, who can't afford real housing and live in share houses in order to catch a foreign man, are like middle school girls. They have no lives and apparently think that bullying, being loud and obnoxious, and vandalizing other people's things is acceptable.

What am I talking about suddenly? Well...

I work as a teacher at an international kindergarten in Tokyo. Kindergarten means, I need sleep. I usually sleep around nine, but since this is a share house, or "social residence", I understand there may be some noise. So, I told the girls who were sitting in the lounge directly outside my room that I was planning to sleep and to please keep it down. The two who were there dimmed the light and started talking quieter. However, when more girls came in, the noise level went up.

When I again went over to the open "window" between me and them and asked them to be quiet, they went silent for a moment. Then they went into apparent shock!

These women in their late 20's and 30's couldn't believe that I would have the nerve to ask them to be quiet while they were in the common space. How could I have the audacity to think that respecting the other residents and at least trying to be quiet should be acceptable to full-grown women?! *shock*

So they proceeded to have long, drawn out conversations about how ludicrous it was to think they should be quiet. They went on in very loud whispers about this for a good ten to fifteen minutes, obviously expecting me to react... and being tired and annoyed, I did. I asked them to be quiet again (or maybe I told them, after all I don't use Japanese much these days.) Their response was to tell me that it was wrong of me to think that my wish for quiet should outweigh their group desire to be obnoxious and loud. When I mentioned that it was ten o'clock and a good time to quiet down, they retorted with, "not for another ten minutes, and the house rules say we don't need to be quiet until eleven." Of course, I knew I should hold in any response to this, but I couldn't help but comment after hearing them continue on about how ridiculous they thought it was that anyone should live in a share house and not expect it to be obnoxiously loud, I couldn't help but mention that I didn't get the memo that children were living here. After all, adults should understand that someone would want to sleep before work.
*Note: Some of these women don't even live in this area of the house, but upstairs where there is actually another lounge area set up that isn't open to anyone's room.

Mind you, if this was the worst, I probably wouldn't post this until much later if at all.

I share a room, or at least a door with a lock, with a French girl. This is important because, for the next hour after I had asked them again to quiet down, they talked on a few other subjects (still loudly and without care) but kept coming back to how surprised they were that anyone should want quiet, or to sleep, or to think they should be quiet. They also talked several times in slightly more quiet whispers about sneaking into my room and stealing the blankets, messing with my things, and other inappropriate (an illegal) things. Mind you, this was all highly amusing until it went on for an hour and made me realize.... these women have NO lives! Which means that it is likely they will remember and try something.

I decided to go to the toilet and made a point of locking my door to see what they'd do/say. When I walked out and returned they turned completely silent (so it is possible). Then I looked the door when I came back in. Maybe I shouldn't have made it so obvious that I understand their idiotic rambling. I soon heard one of them ask "how can we do it though?"

As if on cue, my room share buddy came back from the shower and stopped when she reached the locked (previously unlocked door). They mentioned that I had locked it and then casually changed the conversation to asking if she uses Facebook. She happily said yes and gained some new Facebook friends. I feel like I'm in middle school again. Only I can't just beat people up and get away with it anymore. Damn.

Anyways, I asked the French girl to lock the door when she went out to shower or something. She said it would be troublesome for her and said no one would mess with anything so why bother. When I mentioned that, judging by their conversation for the last hour, I wasn't quite sure about that, she again said it was troublesome. So I restated my request and my insecurity and left it at that.

We shall see. Luckily, except when I shower in the morning and they sleep, I keep most my valuables on my person.

Basically, I just thought this would make an interesting post. If I wasn't involved, I would probably find the story more amusing.

A New Chapter: Share House Compartment Life! o_O

So, I am nearly officially moved! This is good because the moving stress can be finished. This is bad because share house! I have to live with other people and pretend to be social! >.> No! haha

Here is my new box filled with my "I didn't really want to move so I refused to go through my stuff properly and kept way more than I need. Those dark windows are open areas to keep up the air flow, but actually look right into other people's boxes.... Yay! -_-
However, I took care of most of that....

So, other than working through the stuff that I still haven't removed from my smaller suitcases before I shoved them inside the big one and some other random bits.... and the fact that I still seem to have too many clothes.... I am pretty much set to start this new run.
I was really hesitant because I am still looking into other places. However, I really don't want to ride the trains and one shower or morning rush hour trains is still the hardest dilemma for me.

In the meantime, I am at least going to be trying this out for a little while and possibly posting about it as well! The box at least has wifi~ so hopefully I am not too exhausted by ridiculous drunk girls and children to post every now and then.

In other news, spring has come to Japan, according to the tress anyways. The sakura have bloomed and it is officially cherry viewing time. Prepare yourself for flowering trees and festivals!!

Decisions About Living

So, I have realized that getting an apartment when I came to work in Tokyo was a little silly. Why do I say this? Well, because there are so many better options. Also, if you are coming to live in Tokyo and aren't planning to spend the next ten years in THAT apartment, I recommend looking into share houses and furnished apartments (which are often quite small, but convenient when moving).

I didn't know much about these when I was moving to Tokyo, and I was actually hoping to convince my boyfriend to move in with me to save money, so I just went straight for the apartment and bought all the furnishings... and now I'm realizing what a dumb idea that was. Since I broke up with my boyfriend about a month after coming to Tokyo and ended up with the big, lonely apartment with all my stuff. haha

In the end, it would have been better to get a small cheap room in a share house or one of the small furnished apartments with no key money, than to go out and get an apartment (even if I did manage to avoid the key money and several other ridiculous fees.)

Now, for my last few months in Tokyo, I believe... I need to decide how to live. I decided to move into compartment room in a share house, which I talked about before. However, as I was to start working part-time, that was simply the most privacy I could hope for.

The room is not bad, though the house is incredibly cramped and the furniture for the shared lounges takes up so much room that you have to climb over it to reach you door. I will also be sharing two toilets and one shower with twelve other people! The upsides are that it is only a thirty minute walk from my workplace and I don't need to bother with trains (which is really stressful for a country girl like me who doesn't like to touch or be touched by strangers), and that I can save so much money, as the rent is only about $450 a month.

The downside is, when I planned to live there I was going to be working part-time. This meant that, I would be able to work out a time to use the shower and enjoy quiet time alone. However, now this doesn't seem to be likely. If I am to work full-time during the whole three months, it may be better to have my own private room in a place with a better people to toilet/shower ratio. So I have been looking into single rooms in the same company.

The problem with the single rooms is that the price is similar or even more than just staying in my apartment. Too bad I already scheduled the move-out date and sold half my things...
So saving money doesn't look too likely. There are some rooms where I could still manage to save about $200 a month, but I think $100 is probably more likely. While the rent isn't quite as appealing, the idea of sharing five toilets and two baths with seventeen people seems a little better odds of getting in my proper shower time. I swear they must think foreigners don't bath....

So it seems all decided, right? Nope.

If I move to a single room, I have to move further out of Tokyo, which is fine with me except that it means moving away from my workplace. This means, the dreaded Tokyo rush hour morning trains!!! Gods no! To make matters worse, it means I have to wake up earlier to fight over the bathroom and then battle my way on (an off) the train. However, I would have more space and.... sigh.

I might just stay in the small room and suck it up after all.... I can't explain how much I hate the morning train and mornings... I hate them both. x_x

What happens when you don't set a final date (or set one for later)

Before I start on this, I should mention that I really like my company. I do. I like the curriculum and the overall idea. I like that the children are actually learning to think in English and not just repeat it.

However.... while I am glad that my company thinks highly of me as a teacher and wants to keep me around, I really wish they would just make up their minds.

So, I gave my notice at the start of January after vacation with a vague TBA ending date because I knew they were about to open new schools and on a major hiring spree. This should be a good thing for them, right? However, it meant that we had too many teachers who were there, but not permanently there. So I offered to give them time to replace me if needed.

January, I was told that they would replace me by the end of June if I was really leaving, but then I was offered the position to move to one of the new schools outside of Tokyo (that was still pending because they hadn't okayed the location.) After a month of planning and negotiating, I was told that the location was no good after all.

February, I was told that I could stay in case they found a good location (this year, next year, ten years from now...) or that I could be out at the end of April. From June to April and it was coming up fast! However, about a week or two of stress on my part, one of the candidates who signed on to come dropped out. So I was again asked to stay until the end of June.

March, they managed to find enough teachers and got them all to sign contracts, so they thought they were safe. I was told that I could stay on until the end of June if I agreed to occasionally work at the other schools and help train new teachers. I was also told that I'd be only part-time for May and June. Hence my plans to move out of my apartment and into a share house (13 people, 2 toilets, 1 shower... but I'd finish work at 2pm and have the day to myself.) However, the share house let's me save ~40,000yen per month.

For one week I worked with my replacement. She had the perfect disposition for working with this age group (2-3 years old) and it was going well. Then came the call.... Monday night one of the people who was contracted to start in April e-mailed that she had taken another job. My replacement was moved to her position and my company will look for my replacement after April. I have again been asked to work full-time until the end of June.... while living in a share house with 12 other people!

So now... my dilemma is, do I continue with my plan and hope that they find someone sooner and I can opt out of full-time or that I find a boyfriend who lives alone and doesn't mind me sleeping over; or should I trust that this won't change yet again and opt to move into another one of their houses, like the nice one a few stations down that has only 5 single rooms (again with 2 toilets and 1 shower, but only 5 people instead of 13!) However, I will not be able to save money and in fact may be paying about 5,000yen more than I currently am in my apartment....

I could refuse the full-time option, but that might not be an option.... I think I need to have another chat with the director.

The rush before the move

Oh how I hate moving...

So, since my (now) former landlady was a complete spaz (and she recently sold the building which she said would take effect from April, but apparently is in effect as of the first of this month)... I wasn't sure she had accurately relayed my move-out date to the new owner. However, I managed to find out that all is well on that note and that I can move out at the end of this month with no extra rent to pay.

I also paid the deposit on the share house room. However, I am extremely disappointed in the company already. I got my acceptance to the house five days ago, paid the deposit 4 days ago, and received no notification that they had received it and the room was booked. Since they don't let you sign the contract until the move-in day, this seems to be highly inappropriate to me. So I sent an e-mail requesting they give confirmation.

Meanwhile, the selling is going well. I will be living in a big, empty, and cold room for the next three weeks, but as long as I can move everything out in time, what can I say? :)

I am almost regretting the whole thing, but I know in the long run I have made the best decision. Just have to keep reminding myself: I'm saving ~40,000yen (~$400) a month. Yay!

Other work to do... I still need to respond to Gaba about potential part-time work while in Tokyo. They say they do 6-month extendable contracts, but I want to work 3 months.... so I'm debating if I should do the six months, extend my stay at the guesthouse and come to Korea in December or January when job hunting again makes more sense.

I know you can always find jobs in Korea, but the good ones are usually the ones that can keep their teachers to the end of the year, right?

Oh well, need to contact Gaba before anything can be decided anyways~

The Share House part 1

So, for those who read the previous posts, you know that I intend to move into a share house in Tokyo to save money (...I said that right? Maybe? Well now I did.)

So, update!

On Sunday I went to view my #1 share house. It was voted number one because it is within "walking distance" (about 30-40 min 15 if I cycle) to work, and it has available "compartments". Now, I recommend looking these up. I will post a picture when I move in at the end of the month. Basically, they take a room, chop it into smaller rooms, and then cut the room in half from top to bottom and make it like a mini-two-story-duplex-type-I-don't-know. Look it up.

So, I was shown around the house by one of the managers. Two toilets, one shared bathroom, two shared living spaces (one only for girls), one washing machine, two kitchens.... about 12-13 people. Now, if you are me you caught the one bathroom for 12-13 people and went "What?!"
As someone who will be working a 9-6 job for another month after the move and 9-2 afterwards, and I like to shower in the morning.... I hope the other 11-12 people take night showers and/or wake up late. Please god... just three months.... ohmygodwhatamithinking?! haha

Well, I saw, I left, I came back home, I did my online application, I waited a couple days, I got my admittance/acceptance (supposedly they check on your information and make sure you aren't a criminal), and today I sent the deposit + first month's rent (4 days) + first full months rent. Even with the $5 transfer fee, it totaled less than my current apartments rent. So, chance to save money, DONE!

The good thing about this is, after I added my average utility bills to my rent, I realized that I pay a total of ~$840 a month. Wow! Mind you I have my OWN bathroom, my OWN kitchen, and my OWN private insanity arena. ;)
I will miss these, but the compartment will cost me $440 a month, all utilities included. Also, downsizing now will make my move to the guesthouse dormitory that much easier. I hope.

So, now to focus on selling, cleaning, packing, cleaning, selling, and maybe some work too. XD

I don't need anyone to wish me luck, I've never had much. However, if you see the sandman, send him my way!

My plan for 2015

So, I know I haven't posted much... or anything... of my life in Tokyo. However, I may have time in the not-so-distant future to update more and remedy that.

So, those in my group of family and friends know that I gave notice at my job in January. Not because it is a terrible place, for the most part working there has been great. The director is nice and they can be very accommodating. However, I have no interest in staying in Tokyo.

After moving to Tokyo, I developed eczema on my chin. It basically looks like I have a five o'clock shadow all the time that even make-up (unless quite generously applied and re-applied) won't cover. I have been taking pills twice a day since last August which have cleared up all but the eczema, and have recently started using steroid ointment on it. Since it started when I moved to Tokyo and starts to clear up every time I leave Tokyo, the answer is obvious. With other health issues adding on, I'm just ready to move on. (I guess I should consider myself lucky as a co-worker told me his girlfriend developed warts on her hands, and recently his entire nail just fell off, it could be worse.)

In other news, I will share my evil plotting for the future with you now!

While I gave notice in January, my company is currently expanding.  They have been hiring so many new teachers for new schools and training and.... it's been a bit hectic. They weren't sure when they would have someone to replace me, so I (not having a set plan) offered to stay on a little longer on the terms that I wanted certain evenings off by 6pm to take Japanese classes. So, I will stay at my company until the end of June. However, as my replacement will come, my services aren't really needed all day, but I negotiated to continue a little longer as a part-time worker in place of the assistant they were planning to hire.

Part of my negotiation was to give me time to get my things in order, and part of it was just to give me some time to do what I came to Tokyo for: to study! I will moving out of my apartment at the end of March and into a Share House to save some money. I also plan on taking Japanese classes in the evenings to work on my speaking and prepare for the test. (JLPT in July!)

I have said before that saving money in Japan and having fun cannot be done together. Which may be why I have so little enjoyed my time here, but I did manage to save a little. So I am planning my last trip in Japan for Kyoto. I am planning my time in Kyoto for ( I know... it's a terrible idea, but) the summer. Summers in Kyoto, as you can only really understand if you've experienced it, are miserable to say the least.

My plan in Kyoto is a little more interesting, I think. Last year, I took a trip to a guesthouse with my friend. While there, I noticed a sign that said they offered a "cleaning exchange" to customers. I recently looked more into this matter and found out that, if you can guarantee to work for 2+ months, you can work (4 hours of cleaning a day) for free accommodation. If you are interested in coming to Japan long-term, this is something to look into. I have actually seen this offer at many hostels. However, I had no idea you could do it in a more upscale guesthouse.

So, my plan in Kyoto is to work to live, in a different sense. It gives me time to study through the worst weather, make new friends (potentially), meet old friends, explore, and relax.
I know it may be a bad idea or a waste of money, but when I think about it.... I've just wanted a break for so long, and this is a nice way to get one without just being idle in the countryside. I can be semi-idle in Kyoto!

So there it is... my tentative plan. Though the Tokyo part is a little more set. I am going to view my first choice share house tomorrow. *fingers crossed*

Sayonara Sale Tokyo March 2015

I will be leaving Tokyo at the end of the March and it is time to sell!
Prices are all in Yen.

• rice cooker 1.2L (6 servings) 2,000
• bathroom scale 250
• Brown 3 shelf bookshelf 1,000
• green 3 shelf bookshelf 500
• laundry pole 1,000
• hair straightener (Tescom--IONE) 500
• dark green duffel bag with wheels and adjustable handle 500
• kotatsu (large size) 100x70 7,000
• vacuum ("stick type cyclone cleaner") 800**
• balcony "curtain" (mekakushi) 250 for on or 400 for both
• wooden mats (sunoko) 3:87x55 and 1:87x37 all for 500
• curtains (light green) 135x145-ish set of 2 1,200

I have other things as well, mostly free. If you are interested in buying I can bring small items to the closest station (Gakugei-daigaku station, Tokyuu Toyoko Line). For larger items, please pick them up before the end of the month.
Some prices may be negotiable if a reasonable price is asked.
(**not available until ~3/29)
If you would like pictures or more information on the items, please e-mail me at erinmharr@ezweb.ne.jp

Dating in Japan vs. South Korea

I was just reading a blog about IR (interracial dating). This led me to start thinking again on a subject that has been bothering me for... over a year. The differences I've found in the dating culture between Japan and Korea.

Mind you, this is coming from a white woman who likes Asian men. So it may differ for others, but from what I've observed, I doubt it differs that much.

Coming from the American "melting pot", I've grown up in a country where black, white, Hispanic, Asian, you-name-it faces are the norm. In the USA I know there is still trouble with racism, but overall this is not the case. If you are American, for the most part, you are American. Maybe it's just because I've always been very open-minded that I didn't differentiate between peoples backgrounds...

Anyways, I've been living in Asia for several years, I spent a couple in Korea and a couple in Japan. Recently, I noticed a trend in dating.

I used to be a "big girl", I've lost over 30kg in the last 4-5 years. However, In Korea the men didn't care so much. Not that they didn't care at all. Some men after checking me out had no interest in talking/meeting again. In Korea, where they are very vocal about liking women to weigh 110lbs (while most men have no idea what this means except skin and bone), they are much more open to dating women with more curves as long as they are foreign.

What I mean is, when you see a Korean man and a Korean woman together, regardless of how fat, ugly, disfigured, or potentially handsome the man is, the women are usually very slim and often petite. Korean women are supposed to be slim and pretty, and while most Korean men claim that they would never date/marry a woman who's had plastic surgery the truth is that most Korean men won't date a Korean woman who hasn't had surgery.

Meanwhile, you will see Korean men with foreign women and often see the opposite. When it comes to size, Korean men are much more accepting of bigger foreign girls. Now, that isn't to say that they love big girls, just that they accept them much easier than they would a big Korean girl. Of course, they aren't happy about it. You can often times expect to hear things like "You would be prettier if you lost weight" or "If you weighed 52kg, I would be in love with you (true line from a guy friend of mine, who apparently was seriously asking me out...)". These things may make you ask "Are they really more accepting", but honestly, yes. The fact that they will date you, even wanting to introduce you to their parents is a BIG deal. (P.S. I still don't weigh 52kg, just 30+kg less than before.
---
Living in Japan has taught me the exact opposite. Mind you, I am MUCH thinner/healthier than when I went to Korea, but dating here is nearly impossible. I thought it was just because I wasn't trying as hard but that wasn't it. So, as I always do when I feel out of place, I started to people watch more. After moving to Tokyo, I used to frequent Shinjuku and even hang out in areas of Shibuya that are good for observation.

I eventually realized that I never saw a big foreign girl with a Japanese man. I have seen other "big" (over size 6--US) girls here. However, all the these women that I saw with a male partner were with men who were white, black, Philipino, etc.: not Japanese. Even here in Tokyo, I have seen slim-to-no Asian men with women who are bigger than a size 6. In fact, a size six seems to be rare in itself. I must admit, I may have seen a girl or two who MIGHT be as "big" as a size 8 with a Japanese guy! However, they also looked like they should be models (not the anorexic ones we see today, but the healthy looking ones who were chosen more on looks than bones.)

It doesn't seem to matter if they are white, black, Asian, whatever. When it comes to Japanese guys dating Japanese girls, they are so much more accepting of curves and bigger girls, but foreigners? Hell no. I have even been asking my friends to see if it is just my imagination and many tried to deny it before thinking and saying "You're right, I've never seen one couple with a big or average foreign girl and a Japanese guy." or "I knew one guy who married a 'chubby' American girl... oh but, after they moved to Japan they divorced within a year."

I have found this both annoying and fascinating.... It's amazing the differences people are willing to accept from people of the same race/ethnicity/culture than from those of others.

However, I'm sure this isn't just a Korean/Japanese thing. Overall, in the USA there are so many types and people who prefer different things, though even from state to state you will likely see a difference. However, I find that in Korea it went both ways, some were okay with average or above average girls and some weren't, but here in Japan I have not seen this kind of thing. Even in the rare event that they date a girl who is bigger than a size 8, marriage?! What are you thinking? Obviously, I've dated a couple guys here, but one was openly interested in moving to the USA and the other was a playboy, so...

Of course, it's obvious to say, you haven't met the right kind of men, and I perfectly agree. However, neither have 99% of the other average and above average women I've seen here. So I'm thinking it's not just me.